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Couples whose marriages are in trouble face many difficult decisions, all of which have the potential for serious consequences.

Some of these may be:

• Is this marriage worth saving?
• Will the children be harmed?
• What will be the ramifications of our divorce?
• How deeply will it alter our life?

You may also feel:

• Ambivalent about ending the relationship
• You are the most hurt, misunderstood, damaged, or least powerful person in the relationship
• Your partner is using the myriad of divorce counterplays as a way to stay married
• Intimidated by your partner in addressing and resolving complex and difficult issues
• We would have a great divorce if it weren't for the other party
• The divorce is your last chance to destroy the other party

Why Should I Use Collaborative Family Law?

• Non-adversarial — The goal of Collaborative Law (CL) is to reach a mutually-agreed-upon settlement, rather than a "win" in court.
  • CL creates a cooperative environment where communication remains open, which provides a setting where you can work with your spouse to meet your children's needs — regardless of their ages. This helps set a tone for open communication and reduced conflict in the future.
• Respectful — CL is a cooperative and holistic approach that acknowledges and addresses the emotional impact of divorce.
  • Regardless of what process is used, divorce is always a painful journey. CL does not eliminate the pain — it simply helps parties manage it more productively and positively. Through focusing on problem-solving, rather than blame-placing, CL guides families so that at the end of the journey, everyone remains whole.
• Fair — Expert interdisciplinary team works together to maintain the integrity of the CL process, as well as the self-determination of the parties.
  • CL establishes a team instead of adversaries. Your lawyer supports you; your spouse's lawyer supports your spouse. But you all work together and, in doing so, retain control of the process.
• Personal — CL promotes open communication within a confidential environment.
  • Your issues stay within the Collaborative Law setting. That gives you more privacy and greater confidentiality — and less stress during an already stressful time.
• Efficient — More productivity and less posturing can lead to spending less time and money on the divorce process.
  • You can schedule meetings without waiting for court dates. That means you generally spend less time and, as a result, less money to reach closure. It also means you reduce the fear and anxiety associated with court proceedings. Additionally, in matters requiring expert opinions, both parties can jointly hire one independent consultant, which helps shorten the duration of the case and reduce the overall expense.
• Customized — CL parties have the power to create non-standard agreements that fit their particular family situations and lifestyles.
  • You and your spouse shape the agreement together — which means you both are more likely to keep them. This diminishes the parental conflict the adversarial system generates and helps protect children from facing the anguish and divided loyalties that result.

NEXT ... "How Does Collaborative Law Work?"